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Buckle up bitches, we’re going planning!

In my last blog You’re engaged, yay! Now wtf are you supposed to do? I highlighted the need for you and your future spouse to have an open and honest conversation about whether you both truly want to plan (and pay for) a wedding. Since you are back I am assuming you’ve decided that you are both down for the ride, so let’s get started. 

Before we can do anything we need to build our guest list. Creating your guest list first will allow you to properly create a realistic budget and determine which venues can accommodate your event. Who’s ready to go hard in the guest list paint?

Make a List– You can find templates for guest trackers online. Our Virtual Planning Clients have access to an incredible tracker that does most of the hard work for you – including calculating estimated guest counts and tracking catering counts! Creating your guest list can be a daunting task, especially if you are starting from scratch. Just remember the old saying, “How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time.” Just put in what you know and leave blank what you don’t. Addresses and guest names, if you can’t recall a spouse or child name, can be left blank for now. 

Cheat! – This is the only time I can offer this advice ethically. To make everything easier on yourself ask a family member who has recently wed (or is in later stages of engagement) if you can have a copy of their guest list so you don’t have to start gathering addresses from scratch. You can easily paste info from theirs into our spreadsheet for ease of use. 

Children, Yah or Nah? – I get asked all the time how I feel about “Adult Only” receptions. My answer is that it depends on what your ideal reception looks like. Would having children there keep you from having the event that you want? If so, then make sure you are clear that children are not permitted. If your budget allows you might want to consider an event childcare option that would entertain the kiddos in a safe, separate space while the grown-ups have a stress-free time.

Cuts and Emotional Bruising – Keep in mind that your partner and each of your parents will need to be consulted when you put together your list. Whether they are helping you pay or not, it is common practice that they be permitted to add their friends and colleagues to the list. Also, remember that wedding planning is a marathon and not a race, so pick your battles wisely. I typically advise that each person gets a single veto that they can use to challenge someone on the list. Charts like the one shown (courtesy of destinationweddingmag.com) can help to create a standard invite policy to avoid arguments and potential tear/bloodshed. You can always have an “A” and “B” team to allow for attendance control. Just make sure to send out the “B” team invites at least 3-4 weeks before event to keep them from knowing they were a last minute add.

Need more help? Check out our virtual plans where you get a full planning experience from the comfort of your home. 

 

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